We all communicate every day. We talk to our friends, our family, our teachers and even people we do not know very well. However everyone all over again, we are delivering more information than we might care to expose to ourselves. But how do we determine and what to share, with whom? Enter Communication Privacy Management (CPM) Theory.
We are drawn to communication privacy management theory for two principal reasons — (1) the normal person wants a basis on which she can predict what others will keep their selves (2) the same scaling notion is also useful for predicting when people will disclose.
It describes the “norms of delicacy” we establish for our disclosure behaviour, the terms in which we limit ourselves to enable others’ insight into ourselves and what happens if those rules are offended.
The theory was proposed by a communication theorist named Sandra Petronio who aimed to investigate how we use intimacy and privacy throughout our communicative interactions.
Knowing how CPM Theory works allows us to shed more light on the way people treat their personal information, and the reason privacy is key to any relationship. In this post, I want to take an in-depth look at the core concepts of this theory and examine it in practice.
Privacy in Communication
The meaning of the word ‘privacy’ is to keep some of our things on our own. There’s the information we all tell everyone — our favourite colour, where we go to school.
But some of it we prefer to keep private, such as what we think or how we feel about something personal, or a secret that none else must know. Which ones we decide to share with, is dependent on how much we trust them or feel close to them.
Privacy is key to communication because protects our personal information. We do not need to post everything that goes through our heads or hearts to the world. As we lock our doors to keep people out, so too, do we create fortresses around our data to prevent unauthorized use.
This is where CPM Theory comes into play as it serves to explain how we make decisions about things that should remain private and our approach to sharing one aspect of information with others.
What is Communication Privacy Management?
Central to the CPM Theory is the fundamental notion of entitlement to privacy for all. Our information is our “property” and we are the ones who control where it goes and with whom.
This theory states that when we communicate, we use rules to choose what private information we share as well as determine how and when it is communicated.
These are rules that we frame in our minds. The rules are sometimes obvious like never telling a secret to someone who can’t keep it. In other cases, those rules are more lenient and we waive the right to avoid telling a friend how we feel because they mean much to us.
CPM Theory describes boundaries as the lines we put around private information. We never restrict our houses except when we put up fences, so that nobody comes in to disturb us, same in this case.
Boundaries get smaller when we share something intimate or private, even if that secret remains with just one person other than ourselves. Once we tell this particular person to become a “co-keeper” of it, subsequently it is now their responsibility to hold the information confidential as effectively.
What if rules are not followed OR Boundary Cross? This is a boundary violation and it can cause problems in the form of broken trust or hurt feelings.
Why do people feel the need to share their private information?
There are a lot of reasons why people love to express his/her private information. The conversation is set up to go deeper conversations are the place where real movement happens, and it takes vulnerability to do sometimes we do share because the person we are talking with has built enough trust for us to feel like our privacy will be respected.
Sometimes we just share to be closer to you and make our bonds grow stronger. It is in sharing that we connect and feel seen. For instance, you might tell a friend that something has made you sad.
When you open up, you will often find that your friend will offer support, and advice or simply be a shoulder to cry on either way, sharing how you feel can make things easier. They build trust and a solid friendship.
Indeed, some share sensitive information in the hope of seeking help. When in doubt about a problem you have, maybe you would reach out to someone you trust to get their opinion or some assistance. We have problems that sharing in this manner can alleviate and allow us to know we are not alone.
When it comes to personal data people do not always want to share. Or they need their boundary, judgments, or things private. Everybody has their reasons for what they choose to share and what they prefer to keep off record.
Sharing Nonpublic Personal Information Rules
We all develop privacy rules to help us determine when and how much we should disclose. Many factors can affect these rules:
Trust — people are more likely to disclose private info to those they trust We trust someone who has demonstrated that they can keep a secret or will be supportive when we share.
Closeness: Generally, we are more willing to share personal information with someone if we feel close to them. We would disclose more information to our best friend than a total stranger, for instance.
For example, the situation or environment could make us less likely to share. Often we share more comfortably in private spaces, in the home rather than in public places.
Social expectations: You can also have some cultural values towards different it where privacy is concerned. Whereas, in other cultures, personal information can be easily shared by some people, and privacy may not have the value it carries in Western cultures.
Those rules are not typically written out or explicitly said, but take how we say things. This could manifest as an unwritten rule that you don’t share certain personal or intimate aspects of your life with classmates and friends but are willing to discuss them with family members.
While this is true, we tell private stuff to others with the intention they too will abide by the same rules. Misunderstandings do occur, and someone may unintentionally violate the rules.
Consequences of Boundary Violation
We call it a boundary violation in CPM Theory when someone breaks one of our privacy rules or transgresses a boundary we have maintained. There are many ways this can occur. At times, a person can run his mouth about something we told him in confidence. Or, they may want information that we are unwilling or not ready to give.
All these things happen when a boundary is trodden upon. In short, if you tell your friend a secret and they go on to tell others, then it most likely feels as though they violated your privacy. And it makes that person harder to trust going forward.
Failing to deal with that, can break the boundaries of a relationship. Therefore, it is crucial to communicate your privacy boundaries. We need to have others understand what our boundaries are and describe the actions we expect from them. It is possible that if a boundary has been crossed, speaking to each other about it can rectify the suspected breach of trust.
Shared Ownership of Personal Data
But the moment you share your secrets with someone, that person automatically becomes a partner in sharing that information. This means they all have part of the responsibility to ensure that too. You protect your own self, and they should respect that and follow the rules which you set.
The data is privately co-owned so that must be considered wisely. If, for example, a friend confides in you and asks you not to tell anyone else (to keep it to yourself), then retaining the information becomes your responsibility.
Even if someone else asks you about it, and regardless of how well they understand this choice, do not tell them about this information because it is just as much theirs to share.
On the other hand, there are instances in which serving as a co-owner may present some difficulties. But when you believe that a secret is unhealthy, hurtful, or unsafe to keep that can be a different story.
In such cases, it is crucial to weigh in on the implications of crossing the privacy rule. If you are in doubt, or simply if the situation is important to you, consider speaking directly to the person who shared the information.
Moderation between transparency and secrecy
by communication privacy management theory, talks about the tension between openness and privacy. We are always going to want to show our lives off in part, but it is also important to remember that we need to keep some of ourselves undercover. However, finding the right balance is key to making relationships strong and healthy.
Certain types of people are generally more open and would speak their minds, while other types keep it to themselves. Neither way is right or wrong — it just depends on what works for the individual. It is also a reminder of human behaviour that we all have different bounds and need to be respected at all times.
And so openness can facilitate connection and trust, and yet sometimes it is important to be aware that this caveat can come too much too soon for some: can make things seem a bit disordered or out-of-order; they feel caught off balance in that disruption. Conversely, by not sharing enough, it can be difficult to create bonds that have depth.
We therefore have to be very cautious about what we share, who we share it with and the impact that our shared information (or lack of sharing) will make on our established connections.
How Can We Employ CPM Theory in Practice?
Communication Privacy Management Theory: relevance to our everyday lives. This kind of understanding of privacy rules and boundaries helps us determine better what we can share with whom. Oh and maybe out of all this, we can also start to understand the concept of respecting other people’s privacy cause we have our own as well.
Think about what privacy rules an individual might have to respecting their emotions: e. g if a friend told you something in confidence? Do they anticipate one can just pack this information away inside you and never speak of it again?
And always feel free to ask if you’re not sure. Saying, “Do you want me to keep this confidential between the two of us please?” can demonstrate your concern for their privacy.
It may also be useful to have clear lines if you are confiding a personal bit of yourself to someone. Tell them if you want the information kept between the two of you or if it is all right to spread it around. This will help avoid any miscommunications and keep everyone on the same page.
The importance CPM Theory places on privacy also applies to trust and to supporting healthy family, school and friendship networks. This is the best way to build stronger, healthier relationships with respect for each other.
Finding: the significance of privacy in communication
Communication Privacy Management (CPM) Theory explains how people manage their private information decisions. It emphasizes that everyone draws boundaries around what we share or do not, and they expect the same.
